Tag Archives: Canada

Canadians

43% of Canadians prefer bacon to sex.  I think in the metric system that’s a majority.  This once again proves my thesis: there are no Jews in Canada.

Better than sex? Only if it's with my wife.

Advertisements

Justin Bieber

I think my daughter is a lesbian.  All she does is moan for the girl pictured below.  Apparently she’s some kind of Canadian pop princess and — of course — a shiksa.

Side annoyance: When did they start naming girls Justin?

Her mother should be ashamed -- that's just too young for lipstick.

Alan Thicke

So you know what puts TV legend Alan Thicke in the mood?  Listening to the grooves of his pop star son Robin.  Even in Canada, that has to be a shanda.

I have a little experience in this area and, trust me, it’s almost impossible to eek out an erection when your daughter’s practicing violin.  Add in a bass line and some synth and I’d sooner projectile vomit than cut a hole in the sheet.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Trayf of the Week: 9/11 Luau

A Canadian lawmaker has been advertising his pig roast fundraiser with images of the smoldering twin towers.  Some think this smacks of anti-Semitism — but it’s not like he’s using images of Jews burning to death to promote eating trayf.

Wait?  That’s kind of exactly what he’s doing?  Yeah, we don’t like that guy.

Low Expectations

The world is stunned that the United States beat Canada.  Yes, it was at hockey, but I don’t care if the competition is counting maple leaves or lining up funny white comedians who aren’t Jewish.  The US should always beat Canada – and we shouldn’t celebrate like vilde chayas if we do.

Celebrate all you want, but there's no need to make a latke out of your teammate