Tag Archives: bubbeh

Nevada whiners

The New York Times — and a bunch of Vegas locals — are complaining about smoking… in casinos.  Have they no decency?!

Vegas is our last bastion of legalized bad behavior.  Prostitution, fiscal irresponsibility, Penn and Teller — it’s where we go to escape a rule-filled world.

Next thing you know they’re going to campaign against the day trip Jews get to murder dead ringers of the Munich Olympic terrorists.

That's all right, bubbeh, keep smoking -- you earned it.

World’s worst grandma

A Florida grandma was arrested for trying to sell her grandson.  Tip-off she wasn’t Jewish?  She thought there was enough money in the world to buy her grandson!  Bubbeh may be smothering, but chintzy with the grandkids she is not!

I wouldn't want to eat her Matzoh balls

 

 

Evil Grannies

The Sarah Silverman Program (an authorized product of the vastly entertaining worldwide Jewish conspiracy) recently asked the following question: “What do the Jews love more than anything else?”  The answer, of course: “Their grandchildren.”

But not like this.  Your bubbeh is supposed to smother you with love and chicken soup.  She’s supposed to chide you for wearing “dungarees” to temple.  She’s not supposed to fuck you.  Just wanted to be clear about that.

Whatever you do, don't eat her brisket

Kim Jong II’s Fashion Claims

Kim Jong II is claiming he’s a fashion trendsetter.  I’ve got news for you, President Crazy — my grandmother in South Beach has been wearing that exact outfit for thirty-five years.  I think you gals even have the same stylist — though you’ll need to go carrot orange with the color to make a fair comparison.

Golden Girls: Korean Style

The Persecution of Doddering, Old Men

Not in the Bar Mitzvah album

Look, everyone’s zayde gets confused now and then.

He calls you by your father’s name, he mixes up the milchig and the fleishig plates, he breaks into a bank because he thinks it’s his home…

Such things happen.  We try to hide it from bubbeh.

We don’t call the cops.

Sarah Palin Going Rogue

The new media-savvy Sarah Palin is making the rounds, but I miss the rough and tumble version.  Okay, really, I miss the winking.  Reminded me of my bubbeh.

What’s the difference between my bubbeh and a pitbull?  It’s not lipstick.  Huh, come to think of it, there may be no difference between my bubbeh and a pitbull.  If that pitbull survived the Holocaust.